Meet Antron

So last night, I meditated and prayed to God for a few things I need to come into fruition. During my time of meditating, the response was to: let go all of the fear that was stilled locked away in my heart. It’s funny, I really convinced myself that I had somehow become somewhat invincible and yet I still found myself held back by my own hands. Not sure of why it is I do that, however I know now is the time to just do it! Let it go! Just like that! I’ve allowed fear to act as my counsel and dictate my existence for far, far too long. Fear of being disappointed, hurt, burned by love and failing. But I think it’s even deeper than that.

The real problem is, I dont want to end up like some of my family members and become a dead beat, drug addict or a waste of human flesh. I’ve been searching for a sense of purpose. HIV did that but I dont want to make it my entire life. It is apart of my mission to aware the people, however I dont want my desires of not being like some of the men in my family that I am off course and unbalanced. I am AFRAID of not fulfilling my destiny and for letting God down. I am AFRAID of NOT seeing my dreams and hopes realized and manifested. But despite all of it, I was thankful anyway and sometimes you just have to be, even when the circumstance is at it’s end. With this new job that I’ll be starting soon with Speak Life Inc. as their Director of Public Relations( Atlanta Branch), getting into school, writing this new book, I am at the ALMOST stage. When you see your life about to take off but not quit there yet.

It’s exciting yet frustrating. I’m just ready for change already! But hey, what can I do…nothing but wait inside the ALMOST and just allow the universe to take course and align everything as it should be. Before I began trusting The Universe again, I was having doubts. Especially after the entire Ex thing blew up in my face. It had placed me in a state where I was reconsidering to settle for mediocrity. That being a Writer, Activist and anything else was a waste of time and I should get a job that I hate and stay there for 40 years. I’m not complaining, just being honest. However, was that me or the fear inside of me talking? THE FEAR! So I will spare myself a pity party and decided to give this a chance. One that will let me know for sure where this lady named Destiny lies. I have nothing to loose. Today, I took a baby step, now I’m un-crippling me, myself and I and talking to mountains that are really only illusions fear’s using to trick my mind and taking big giant steps to own up to my dreams. FUCK FEAR! I’m too old to keep myself back, hell I’ll be twenty-six this year.

More about this AMAZING young talent at: Antron-Reshaud.net!